Teapot tape transcript | The Jackal

27 Jan 2012

Teapot tape transcript

Banks: Yeah, so it’s been great. Um, and um…this is great territory for you.
Key: Yeah. No. It’s a great spot and um I mean, we’ve done well to follow that up from…
Banks: I’m sure you’ll get 70% of the party vote here.
Key: Yeah, it feels like that, yeah.
Banks: Feels very good.
Key: Across the country actually we’ve got some…most of our electoral polling is looking really really good so…I’m a bit suspective – I think theoretically Palmerston North could be in play, theoretically Rimutaka could be in play, but I’m suspect in Palmerston North because my [] last time and um, he um, he…he…he bloody worked hard last time, for myself I don’t…he knocked on a lot of doors for a year, so I’d be surprised…I mean, she’s quite good but I’d be a little bit surprised –
[Tea cups set down. Media snap photos and are shooed away]
Key: The most photographed cup of tea in the world.
Banks: This is a very good media contingent.
Key: Yeah, it’s huge ay?
Banks: I’ve got to tell you…
Key: Wherever I go though there’s more big numbers normally, yeah, waiting, waiting to trip me up. [To the wait staff] Thank you!
Banks: I mean, uh…
Key: [To wait staff] Cheers. Thanks very much.
Banks: There’s 30 here today.
Key: Yeah.
Banks: That’s very very good.
Key: Apparently Roy Morgan’s out this afternoon is very good too and TV3’s very good at the weekend for us, but it’s all pretty solid. I’d say the Herald will be slightly low, but you know, margin. I mean, in the end it’s going to ease down, would be my guess, go…we’ll get to 50, 49 50, anything around there will be good enough.
Banks: Yeah. It will be good…
Key: Yeah, I expect so…well, you know what campaigns are like. When you’re where we are, the risk is in the downside…
Banks: The election has been very, very nasty.
Key: Yeah, yeah. I don’t…I don’t think that’s a strategy that works very well. I reckon you’re much better just to get out there and promote what you’re doing, promote your policies and…
Banks: You have got no idea how vicious they’ve been, you know, especially at public meetings, but um, we can handle that and I’m not buying into it.
Key: No.
Banks: I’ve been around too long, I’m not…
Key: I feel the same and…
Banks: I don’t play the…
Key: No, no, I don’t reckon it works. When you look at Roughan last week in the paper saying ‘the moment he called him a liar I knew it was all over’ and I mean, it’s so, you know, there are so many things where you go ‘I could spend my life on this stuff’ but you know, I can’t be bothered and I’m not going to do it. And I just don’t think it’s going to take me anywhere. I mean, I was, I’m there to make a difference, I’m just going to keep on working on it each year, and I’m actually proud of the record we’ve got and that’s what we’re going to be.
Banks: Yeah. Someone’s told me you’re gonna be, you’re going to be working with uh
Key: Yeah, yeah. It’s good. Yeah, no that’s right…I reckon you guys are…yeah yeah…unfortunately that’s always the case.
Banks: I didn’t know.
Key: No, no, no [chuckles softly]…um…but you…you guys will track at some point. Bit of luck…so what I’m going to do when I go out is I’m gonna say, look we’ve worked with Act for the last three years, provided strong and stable government, blah blah, and then I’m just going to run them through and say look, in 2005 and 2008, the voters of Epsom gave their party vote to National then voted tactically and if they do so in 2011 I wouldn’t be at all unhappy about that, we’re likely positioned to provide strong and stable government again blah blah blah. And they’ll ask about how I’m going to vote for the National candidate, and that’s because I am the leader of the National Party here’s my job, and then if they go on to the ministerial warrants, let’s just say we’ll go through it another day.
Banks: And, you might, you might be inclined to say ‘I know John quite well.’
Key: Yeah. That’s right, yep.
Banks: And we’ve had a good working relationship, and we did a lot of stuff together.
Key: Yep. Worked well.
Banks: We’ve achieved a lot.
Key: Yep. We’re on the same page.
Banks: Do you think Winston will be back this time?
Key: [dismissive laugh] No, not at all no chance.
Banks: [mumble]
Key: [amused] Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s , but no, no, not a show. He, look, he’s at 2.5 I think on the TV3 poll, we have him about 2.5, 3. Look, he polled 4 last time, he’ll poll 3 this time, a lot of his constituents have all died. He won’t poll, I don’t think he’ll poll much above 3 this time.
Key: How are you enjoying it? Is it just bloody hard going?
Banks: Oh, it’s hard going, I mean it’s really hard, I mean, I’m at it 14 hours a day. Bus stops this morning, on buses, in the trains, on the trains, railway stations, taxi stands, pushing it hard, and ah, but it’s quite small, the response here is amazing. Our polling this week shows the gap between Paul and I is closing anyway, albeit there’s some distance, but a couple of key media have him well out in front…
Key: Look at the end of the day, there will always be [] both [], but you shouldn’t be worried about the [] help with the Maori Party that will be a very different set of circumstances, and um…
Banks: Makes your time here very…
Key: Mmm, mmm, yeah, I’m not worried.
Banks: I think the Labour Party have um have given up on Epsom.
Key: Oh, yeah.
Banks: He’s a horrible fellow, that candidate. Nasty, nasty.
Key: He is, ooh, nasty. They’re a nasty party in a lot of ways.
Banks: Yeah, well, you know they’ve been putting stuff in letterboxes about me. Shocking stuff.
Key: Yes, that’s nasty. That’s what they do, they play the person the whole time. We never do that stuff.
Banks: And John, I think the important thing is the [] politics, the policies, [] I’ve learned that the long term experience is never any value with them…
Key: No, it doesn’t help you, does it?
Banks: People…people…
Key: I mean, longer term I reckon Act’s gotta…the reason I didn’t text you is because it’s better if I don’t because it puts you under pressure to say he has or he hasn’t you know?
Banks: No, no I haven’t heard from the Prime Minister.
Key: No, no, it’s easier to say…
Banks: I don’t expect you to [] on me…what’s that number of yours? I’ve got two numbers for you.
Key: Oh, the proper one is [number omitted from transcript]
Banks: [repeats number]. I haven’t talked to you…they want us to know I haven’t heard from the Prime Minister. I think it’s important during the campaign we stay at arm’s length. He’s got his party, and…
Key: Definitely.
Banks: I think that after the election with Catherine…
Key: Yeah, she’s good.
Banks: Don Nicolson, and Steve Whittington, the four of us, we can completely restructure and rebuild this party.
Key: That’s right. And she’s good actually. She’s…I reckon she’ll have quite a bit of female appeal.
Banks: Yeah.
Key: Yeah, that’s where you’ll…
Banks: He’s a strange fellow, the other fellow isn’t he?
Key: Mmmm! Oh, yeah! Yeah, no, no, we’ve been down that road! That is why when they rang me in the UK I never ever thought of this, you know, 15 percent we’d have a snap election…
[quiet mumbling]
Banks: I didn’t know. I didn’t know.
Key: Well, you learn everyday. So, you want to do the standup? Is that yours? Is that yours? Is that yours?
Banks: No.
Key: Hey, that’s a recording device.

Hat tip Blue