Is Chris Luxon the Dumbest Prime Minister Ever? | The Jackal


23 Jun 2025

Is Chris Luxon the Dumbest Prime Minister Ever?

New Zealand’s Prime Minister, Christopher Luxon, has once again proven his knack for spouting utter drivel, this time with his brain-dead claim that the United States’ unprovoked and illegal bombing of Iran, cheered on by genocidal Israel, somehow opens a golden window for diplomatic “dialogue.” 

It’s the kind of statement that makes you wonder if Luxon’s been sniffing glue or just reading from a script penned by warmongers. Let’s unpack this steaming pile of nonsense and remind ourselves why this bloke’s leadership is a national and international embarrassment.

 

Today, The Post reported:

 

The US strike on Iran creates “opportunity” for dialogue, says Prime Minister Christopher Luxon.

Luxon, speaking from a war memorial for New Zealand soldiers in Messines, Belgium days out from a Nato meeting, which US President Donald Trump is expected to attend, offered no direct criticism of the strikes.

“We do not want to see a nuclear armed Iran. But now there is an opportunity, as we look forward from these strikes to actually, get around and use diplomacy and dialogue and negotiation to actually get a political solution in place,” he said.

“Really it's about the future. It's really about what actions are going to be taken in the days and the weeks ahead to actually make sure that stability and security is returned.”


Luxon’s latest gem, reported in the wake of the US’s 22 June 2025 airstrikes on Iran’s nuclear sites at Fordow, Natanz, and Isfahan, suggests that blowing up a sovereign nation’s infrastructure is a cracking way to kickstart a chat. Never mind that Iran wasn’t actually building a nuclear weapon, something confirmed by the IAEA, US intelligence community, and even Trump’s own Director of National Intelligence, Tulsi Gabbard's 20 June 2025 report, before Trump predictably dismissed her assessment. Iran was already at the negotiating table, engaging in talks hosted by Oman in May 2025, ready to discuss its nuclear programme for peaceful energy purposes. But apparently, nothing says “let’s talk” like eight bunker-buster bombs dropped by B-2 stealth bombers.

The reality is as clear as Luxon’s bald head under studio lights: Iran was complying with the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty (NPT) and open to dialogue until the United States decided to escalate a shadow war into a full-blown aerial assault. Now, Iran’s parliament is drafting a bill to withdraw from the NPT, and, having moved their 60% enriched uranium before the strikes, are now more likely to pursue nuclear weapons development, a direct consequence of the US and Israel’s unprovoked warmongering.

Far from fostering dialogue, these attacks have obliterated any chance of it, with Iran’s Foreign Minister Abbas Araghchi stating on 23 June 2025 that they won’t enter into negotiations while Israel and the United states were continuing to bomb Iran. Luxon’s claim that this chaos creates “opportunity” is so detached from reality it’s practically orbiting Jupiter.

Let’s not forget that Israel’s ongoing bombardment of Tehran, hitting oil depots, civilian sites, and even state broadcasters, shows their goal isn’t just about stopping nuclear development. It’s now another war of attrition, not a surgical strike to prevent a non-existent nuclear bomb-making programme. And the US? Trump’s been itching for this since he tore up the 2015 nuclear deal, with plans for these strikes simmering for months, as leaked Pentagon documents revealed in April 2025. His administration’s sudden pivot to bombs over talks reeks of dishonesty, using Israel as a proxy to flex military muscle while pretending it’s about peace.

Luxon’s idiocy isn’t new. This is the same genius who claimed that Kiwis were “better off” under his government while real wages stagnated and public services crumbled. Or when he babbled about “streamlining” the Resource Management Act on 10 August 2023, only to admit he hadn’t even read the bloody thing. Then there was his 5 December 2024 clanger, insisting NZ’s housing crisis was “solvable overnight” by cutting red tape. But all the National led government has done is cancel state house builds and thrown thousands of people out of emergency housing onto the streets. And who can forget his pledge to “turbocharge” the economy by slashing public sector jobs, only for unemployment to balloon to 5.2%? The man’s a walking soundbite with the intellectual depth of a kiddie pool.

Unfortunately Luxon's not alone in the dunce corner. Australia’s Anthony Albanese called the US strikes on Iran “a necessary step for regional stability,” conveniently ignoring the illegality of the attack, Iran’s non-existent nuclear weapons program and a prior willingness to negotiate. UK’s Keir Starmer also mumbled about “supporting de-escalation” while refusing to condemn Israel’s follow-up bombings, a spineless dodge that rivals Luxon’s waffle. But Luxon’s special, he’s got a knack for saying nothing while sounding like he’s solving everything.

Worse, the NZ government’s silence on the US’s illegal attack is deafening. Foreign Minister Winston Peters has been careful not to criticise Israel and the United States' illegal attacks, and Luxon’s refusal to condemn the strikes or call for a ceasefire shows a spineless failure to uphold NZ’s legacy as a peacemaker. By not pressuring the US and Israel, they’re letting warmongers run riot, undermining any hope of de-escalation. New Zealand could be rallying the world to demand accountability, but instead, Luxon’s government is twiddling its thumbs, complicit by inaction and appearing to support a clear breach of the United Nations charter.

Here's what the doddering coalition of chaos fools did instead:

Lux-O-Flakes cannot even bring himself to call for a ceasefire, even though the US and Israel’s illegal airstrikes on Iran, absent an imminent threat or Security Council approval, constitute a breach of Article 2(4) of the UN Charter and amount to the crime of aggression. Israel’s ongoing attacks and the US’s direct and enabling roles, through military aid and diplomatic cover, exacerbate these violations. New Zealand’s silence, alongside the equivocations of other western politicians like Albanese and Starmer, highlights a failure to uphold the Charter’s principles. While the US and Israel may argue strategic necessity, the lack of evidence and disregard for Iran’s sovereignty and prior negotiations render their actions legally indefensible.

The tragedy is that Luxon’s ignorance, similar to other idiotic right-wing leaders, abets a dangerous US-Israel agenda that thrives on chaos, not solutions. Iran’s nuclear programme was never the threat they claimed, and bombing it has only hardened Tehran’s resolve. Luxon’s cheerleading for “dialogue” in this context isn’t just stupid; it’s a betrayal of New Zealand’s commitment to peace and international law. Is he the dumbest PM we’ve ever had? When you stack his record against Muldoon’s pig-headedness or Key’s smarmy amnesia, Luxon’s vacuous optimism and chronic foot-in-mouth disease make a strong case. Wake up, Chris. The world’s burning, and your vacuous soundbites are fanning the flames.

Published by the Jackal